36 questions to fall in love with
Editorial experience: what will happen if you pass the test ” 36 questions to fall in love»
20 years ago, psychologist Arthur Aron compiled 36 questions that can help two strangers fall in love with each other. The success was deafening: the couple Aron was experimenting with got married six months later. And we decided to check whether this is true or not.
What is the point. The couple takes turns answering 36 questions from the list in order, and at the end of the experiment, they look into each other’s eyes for four minutes in silence.
Who is participating. For the purity of the experiment, we took four subjects: a couple who had been dating for a couple of months, and a guy and a girl who were completely unfamiliar with each other.
How much time is required. At least an hour.
About questions. Perhaps the positive result (friendship, love, and other joys of life) is due to the fact that the questions imply sincere and detailed answers. And by the way, from the very beginning it is more like entertainment – the first questions are quite simple and do not require serious emotional costs. But at the same time, they make you feel like the person opposite and start trusting him. That’s why you start answering the questions from the second block automatically, without even thinking about the fact that this is too intimate information.
Results of the pair #1.
The two of them couldn’t stand it for four minutes in silence. “We started laughing, discussing the test, and came to the conclusion: magic did not happen, although we became emotionally much closer to each other. I guess it’s because we were at the very beginning of our relationship and without this test, we were infatuated with each other. And I thought, by the way, that this is the perfect practice – to take this test when you start dating someone and you realize that it can be serious-this is a great opportunity to find out some sharp points, without starting a separate serious conversation about it. We learned a lot of new and important things about each other and for some reason became more attentive to each other after that.”
The result of the pair #2.
And here the butterflies in my stomach did not fly up. The guys did everything according to the rules and even endured four difficult minutes at the end. And although they didn’t feel in love, there was still a spark between them. “We continued to communicate after the experiment, constantly corresponded and soon go on a date, – says Nastya. – We are swinging for a long time, because… Well, it’s weird to have a relationship after these questions. But I have a good feeling about this.”
Conclusion: It is impossible to remain indifferent to the person on the contrary after this experiment – you learn too much personal about him and open your soul yourself. But there is a chance that you will find out not the most attractive information about the interlocutor and he will disappoint you.
Try to pass the test and you. Here are the most mysterious 36 questions that will make (or at least try to make) you fall in love.
- If you could invite someone to dinner (a close person, a deceased relative, a celebrity), who would you choose?
- Would you like to be famous? In what way?
- Before you make a call, do you rehearse your line? Why?
- What would be your “perfect day”?
- When was the last time you sang alone? And for someone else?
- If you could live to be 90 and have either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years, which would you choose?
- Do you have a secret premonition of how you will die?
- Name three traits that you think both you and your partner have.
- What do you feel most grateful for?
- If you could, what would you change about the way you were raised?
- In 4 minutes, tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
- If you could wake up tomorrow with some skill or ability, what would it be?
- If a magic crystal could reveal the truth to you, what would you like to know?
- Is there something you’ve been dreaming of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it yet?
- The biggest achievement of your life?
- What is the most valuable thing for you in friendship?
- What is your dearest memory?
- And the most terrible memory?
- If you knew that you would die in a year, what would you change in the way you live? Why?
- What does friendship mean to you?
- What role do love and tenderness play in your life?
- Take turns naming your partner’s positive traits (exchange five characteristics).
- Are your family relations warm and close?
- How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
- Make three statements each that are true for both of you. For example, “We both now feel…”
- Continue the phrase: “I would like to have someone with whom to share…»
- If you were going to be a close friend to your partner, what would you tell them right now?
- Tell your partner what you like about him; speak directly, say things that you could not say to a casual acquaintance.
- Share with your partner an unpleasant situation or an embarrassing moment from your life.
- When was the last time you cried in front of someone?
- Tell your partner what you already value in him (her).
- In your opinion, what topic is too serious to joke about?
- If you were to die today before the end of the day, without speaking to anyone, what would you most regret? Why haven’t you said that yet?
- Your house and all your possessions caught fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to run into the house and save something else. What would you take? Why?
- Which of your family members would you be most upset about dying? Why?
- Share a personal problem and ask your partner how they would handle it. Then ask him what he thinks of your feelings about the problem.